Basecamp for Men E104: Finding the Flow in Chaotic Times

E104: Finding the Flow in Chaotic Times with Special Guest author Kari Hohne

 

E104 Introduction

I first came across today’s guest in a beautiful 7-minute video she made titled The Art of Going with the Flow. It resonated with me. Sometimes with wisdom teachings, we just need to be reminded. The essential truth is already inside of us.

We are all doing our best to navigate these strange times we find ourselves in. There is not agreement amongst us and that is fine.

As my guest today so eloquently states, chaos is a sign of growth and renewal. It means the old systems and energies that go with it are in decay. This is how nature intends it. There is a lot of talk in spiritual circles about the chaos of ushering the new paradigm. I for one am optimistic as is my guest today.

There is a strong tendency amongst my inner circle to fight. We are actively engaged in protecting our Constitutional rights from over-reaching Governors and health bureaucrats with an agenda.

But my guest today reminded me in a gentle and powerful fashion that perhaps all of this chaos is a test. Not necessarily a test of our willingness to fight for our principles, although we are being tested that way as well.  But a test of faith. Can we trust this whole process we are in? Can we trust one another and the Divine to usher us into the new epoch?

I for one can see where I can  still strengthen my faith and trust that we are unfolding the truth in a beautiful and perfect way. Can we leave all the angst and fear and scarcity behind? What do you think? What parts of us are starting to emerge? This is the question that excites me and inspires me on a daily basis. I am happy to have you along for the ride my friends. Let’s renew our faith in our emerging story and one another.

Kari Hohne Bio-

Kari Hohne is a popular author of many translations of ancient texts. Her books include The Mind’s Mirror, The Mythology of Sleep, Nothing Bad Happens in Life, and her latest book The Common Archetypes of the Tarot. Here is my interview with Kari Hohne.

E104 Final Thoughts

I hope you enjoyed our time with Kari Hohne. To find her and all of her great resources, go to www.cafeausoul.com.

 

 

Basecamp for Men E103: Freeing Yourself from “Niceness”

E103:Freeing Yourself from “Niceness” with Special Guest James Rapson

 

E103 Introduction

One of the common things I see men struggle with is how do you break out of this people pleasing fixation. It is the curse of Nice Guys and Nice Girls. You always need to be getting your approval and validation “over there”. It seems that, if this was a strategy we used as children, unaddressed, this coping pattern will continue to assert itself, showing us in spades that simply pleasing others with our niceness is an insufficient strategy if we are to navigate  our lives in more heroic and authentic ways.

I used to be a full on people-pleaser. No shit. Many from my past might remember this side of me.  A Nice Guy. UGH!! Now I see that it was all part of my development as a man. I needed to outgrow this immature, validation-seeking part of myself. And I had many teachers along the way. Particularly when I got involved with the Mankind Project.

I remember when I first got initiated by MKP and attending my very first men’s wisdom councils. I couldn‘t believe how these guys spoke to one another. There was a rough-and-tumble honesty among the men and complete disregard for being nicey-nice.  These men commanded respect with their truthfulness and authenticity.

It wasn’t that these men were just being assholes, although sometimes this happened when a man was triggered. It’s that they had a freedom of expression that was not bound by the Nice Guy mold. I  would use these chapters in my life to grow past the old Happy-Go-Lucky Nice Boy that was such a dominant part of my young adult life. The Warrior archetype would finish him off in my forties as my inner strength as a man grew.

I still know many men that are hemmed in by incessant people-pleasing. It‘s widespread. My guest today wrote a book and knows a lot about this topic. I’m looking forward to dialoguing with him.

James Rapson Bio

James Rapson has been an innovator in the field of personal and professional development for over 20 years. A former psychotherapist, his focus is now on training and coaching. He is an internationally-published author and a nationally-recognized speaker and workshop leader.

And he co-authored the book Anxious to Please: 7 Revolutionary Practices for the Chronically Nice with long-time friend and collaborator Craig English. Here is my interview with James Rapson.

E103 Final Thoughts

I hope you enjoyed our time with James as much as I did. To find James and his book, go to www.jamesrapson.com

Basecamp for Men E102: The Alchemy of Vibration

E102: The Alchemy of Vibration

 

E102 Introduction

I have long been a fan of esoteric studies. This has been true for around 20 years or so. It could be just about anything off the beaten path- alchemy, meditation, ET stuff, Tesla, fractal geometry, crop circles, secret space program. Anything that is in the occult, which is a word that means “hidden”, not “devil worshipper” as some would have you believe.

In some of the spiritual/consciousness communities there is something that starts to come into focus over time. That frequency or vibration may just be the key to understanding the whole kit and caboodle.  Here is a quote by the great visionary scientist and futurist Nicola Tesla. He said,

“If you want to know the secrets of the Universe, think in terms of energy, frequency, and vibration.”

 

The esoteric classic The Law of One speaks of vibration on dozens of occasions. Mystery schools east and west speak of vibration and alchemy as keys to something astounding. What could it be, I wonder? It seems there is something here that we are discovering in this process of our awakening.

We have been so conditioned to receive the world as a passive observer. That whatever happens in the world is out of our control. Like a hand at blackjack, whatever happens is just unfolding. Is this true or have we all just been taught and then internalized this belief?

Does happiness, bliss, creativity, inspiration, joy and play just happen when the circumstances are just right? Or are these higher states of consciousness that we cultivate and grow in our neuropathways to be shared and co-created with others in our tribe. Remember, alchemy is an inside game and spiritual awakening is a group effort.

Come listen in on a discourse about frequency, energy, and vibration.

 

Basecamp for Men E101: What is Skillful Living?

E101: What is Skillful Living with Special Guest Chris Beatie

 

E101 Introduction

I received a text message from a friend that had a little list of Right Livelihood principles and I immediately wanted to do an episode about it. Making a weekly 30 minute show turns you into someone who makes fast creative decisions.

I don’t have tons of episodes in the pipeline the way some podcasters do. I am a shoot-it-and-upload-it-now sort of guy. I tend to find stuff and turn it into content quickly.  I think this has been a blessing as I know some podcasters who labor over episodes for weeks trying to get it just right.

I really don‘t have the temperament for that. So I will see a meme or read an article that someone sends me and I’m off and running.  Make it good, pull the trigger on publish, and move onto the next episode.

Also, podcasters rarely have time to listen to other peoples podcasts. Isn’t that funny? All of the podcasters I have interviewed and spoken with all tell me the same thing: I am too busy making my show to listen to much else. Such is creative life at the microphone.

My guest today is my good friend Chris Beatie.  He’s a man who walks the talk and someone I can always count on. Let’s go have a conversation with him about skillful living.

Chris Beatie Interview

E101 Final Thoughts-

I hope you enjoyed our time with Chris and found value in that episode. I love the way Chris shows up as a man. We had a good laugh afterwards as we asked each other-did we get too personal? And then we both shrugged and said, “Fuck it, it’s good they hear this.”

I count Chris as someone I can trust on about 10 different levels. And my blessing to you my listener is that you have a man or two in your life who is unafraid of owning up to his own shadow the way that Chris models for us.

It opens up the possibility that we can speak to one another with newfound honesty and courage. It means we can finally be real with one another.

 

 

Basecamp for Men E100: The Learning Inside of Your Marriage

E100: The Learning Inside of Your Marriage with Special Guest Kimberly Holmes

 

E100 Introduction

Wow, I can’t believe we have made it to episode 100! I feel a sense of accomplishment with this and I want to start off  by thanking my excellent sound editor Chris Rodd. Chris, I couldn’t have done it without you.

And I would like to thank you my listener for giving our show a try and, for many of you, putting it into your regular rotation of podcasts. I really appreciate the follow. And if you are a fan of the show, help us by recommending it to a friend or two or giving us a review on Apple podcasts. Both of these actions help us to continue to grow and get the word out.

As many of you know, one of my interests is how we can best show up as men in our most important relationships. These primary relationships (with our spouses or life partners, with our children, with our siblings and our parents) will inevitably bring our most challenging issues to the surface.  They always do.

There is an interesting dynamic at play. These most intimate relationships are the ones we CARE the most about. And what tends to show up in the things we care about the most? Challenges and obstacles. Ones that we seem to sub-consciously put in our own way as we learn to love one another and ourselves unconditionally.

It is not hard to see that is is not always the great parts of us that are in our marriages and partnerships. We each show up with our unique wounds and insecurities. Our neediness, our upsets, our fears.

And there is a paradox at play. We seem to want unconditional love from one another but then keep putting parts of ourselves out there that we don’t even love. It is like we are telling our partners, “I don’t really like this small, needy, insecure part of myself, what do YOU think?”.

We long for the healing of our deepest wounds and then misguidedly ask our poor unsuspecting partner to do the healing. We often don’t suspect that it is ourselves that hold the key to the healing and love we have been looking for from our partners.

I sometimes think that our spouses and life-partners are really here to  bear witness to our courage to confront ourselves and to change. They encourage us to be true to ourselves and do our best to love life and them, with a full and open heart.

My guest today knows a lot about learning in a relationship. Let’s go have a conversation.

 

Kimberly Holmes Bio-

Kimberly Bean Holmes is the CEO of  Marriage Helper, an organization that seeks to give couples new resources for their journey.  She is also the CEO and Creator of PIES University. Kimberly is also the host of the It Starts With Attraction Podcast. Her videos, podcasts, and following reach over 200K people a month who are making changes and becoming the best that they can be. Here is my interview with Kimberly Holmes.

E100 Final Thoughts-

I hope you enjoyed my interview with Kimberly Holmes. I love what she said about how even if you are the only one to do inner work to help the relationship. This will often be enough to get positive development going. Because some of you might have partners that are not interested in therapy or working on things and that is ok. As long as YOU are willing to work on yourself, things will tend to grow in the relationship as well.

I also love what she said about  remember that how you make your spouse FEEL is so important. I think this is such an important point and I think it can get lost in long-term relationships. I know I lose sight of it from time to time.

Lastly, I asked Kimberly for a couple of book recommendations for you and I have a couple as well. Kimberly recommends 8 Datesby Dr. John Gottman and Daring Greatly by Brene Brown. My two relationship books that I love are Getting the Love You Want by Harville Hendrix and Passionate Marriageby David Schnarch