Basecamp for Men E67: The Intelligence of the Heart

E67: The Intelligence of the Heart with

Special Guest Howard Martin

 

E67 Introduction-

Since it inception, Basecamp for Men has zeroed in on a number of themes. Men’s work and myth to keep us connected and inspired. Health and vitality so that we look and feel out best. We’ve had episodes on the tools we need to better see ourselves with clarity and honesty. As well as how we can be the best husbands and fathers we can be. How do men go about growing their emotional intelligence? Or their spiritual intelligence? What does that look like for men? And we have looked at what is in the shadow, both in ourselves and the world at large.

Today’s episode fits nicely with our catalogue as it is about the intelligence of the heart. If there is a thread that runs through all of Basecamp (besides the Hero’s Journey), it is this: how do men live with more heart? This is a central question in all of the men’s groups that I lead. How do we cut through all the excessive thinking, the cognitive noise, and ego to live our lives more fully from the heart?

Remember men, the heart always knows the way. No matter what is going on. No matter how crazy and confusing the world looks like and feels, the heart can be counted on as your most reliable compass of what is true.

My guest today is an expert on matters  of the heart and I am excited to be in dialogue with him.

Howard Martin Bio-

Howard Martin is a key spokesperson for the HeartMath Companies. Through his public speaking events, Howard illuminates the intelligence of the heart, describing how we can all access it to create positive and sustainable change. He is a co-author of the highly acclaimed book The HeartMath Solution and contributing author of Heart Intelligence. Most recently, Howard helped to co-create The HeartMath Experience, a new online video program introduced by HeartMath in January 2020.

E67 Final Thoughts-

I hope you enjoyed our conversation with Howard.

Howard is gifting Basecamp for Men listeners with free access for a limited time to the HeartMath Experience. A beautifully crafted online video program experience that feels like you’re watching a movie while you learn key techniques based on research and developed by HeartMath. To get free access go to HeartMath.com.

 

 

 

 

Basecamp for Men E66: The Truth is also Seeking the Seeker

E66: The Truth is also Seeking the Seeker

with Special Guest Marie Jones

 

E66 Introduction-

“The Truth is also seeking the Seeker.”

Here we are, in our collective Hero’s Journey. Each contributing what he or she is able to. We started with myth and men’s work,  gathering our resources and seeing which tools we would need for the next chapters of our Hero’s Journey. We’ve talked to men and women about the most important topics that we can find, leaving no stone unturned.

We are coming up on a series of episodes that are very important for us as a tribe. The faint trail of the Hero has taken us out into the darkness, out to our edges.

You may disagree with the information I am uncovering or even get mad and triggered. That is fine with me. It is to be expected. I honor where you are at in your awakening. I really do.

There is something that has been hidden from our view that has slowly emerged in our inner vision.  We are finally seeing it clearly. We have arrived at a threshold. The Truth is, indeed,  seeking the Seeker. We have traversed the landscape, found our allies, and now confront a dark dragon. One that many of us did not know that we would have to face.

So we continue along the faint trail, picking up allies and using our sense of Truth as our compass and guide. The Hero in the story is developing latent and long-dormant abilities that he or she will need for the coming chapter. We are pre-destined to awaken, you and I. This, it seems, has already been written.

There is a sense of Divine intervention in these episodes for me. The subject matter has evolved but he foundation remains the same. I hold the question “What do we need for our next chapters?”  Then I listen and follow the instructions. My guests have all arrived at Basecamp for Men through this process.

Today’s guest shares my love of the Divine and myth and the mystery of our collective Journey.

Marie Jones Bio-

Marie D. Jones is the best-selling author of over 25 non-fiction books on diverse topics including the paranormal, Ufology, mind control, propaganda and media manipulation, myth and symbolism, ancient knowledge, archetypes, cutting edge science, time travel, and more. She is also a novelist and  screenwriter and has been interviewed on over 2,000 radio shows and podcasts all over the world. She also appeared on the History Channel’s “Ancient Aliens” and “Nostradamus Effect” series.

E66 Final Thoughts-

The second half of our conversation reminded me of a quote by the Indian author Arundhati Roy. She says:

“THE SYSTEM will collapse if we refuse to buy what they are selling- their ideas, their version of history, their wars, their weapons, their notion of inevitability. Remember this: We be many and they be few. They need us more than we need them.Another world is not only possible, she is on her way. On a quiet day, I can hear her breathing.”

For more information on Marie Jones or to find any of her 26  books, go to www.mariedjones.com

 

 

Basecamp for Men E62: Marriage as a Hero’s Journey

E62: Marriage as a Hero’s Journey with Special Guest Lisa Rezac

 

E62 Introduction-

As part of our Hero’s Journey, men will often struggle with our interractions with the Feminine. Both the women in our lives and the Feminine aspect that is inside every man. Women have the ability to confound us, test us, push us, as well as celebrate and elevate us.

My own marriage and partnership with my wife Lisa has lasted more than twenty-five years now. The learning in this relationship has been astounding.  She has, in many ways, been my most important teacher. I would not be the man I am today without her influence.

In your primary relationships, ALL of your baggage and your shadow come into play. The soft underbelly of your ego gets exposed. Any bullshit you might be trying to pull out in the world, any persona that you construct to come across as nothing but confident and positive will surely be exposed (and wilt) in the slow burn furnace of a long-term relationship.

A good marriage absolutely REQUIRES you to show up authentically. Warts and all. Fear and shame, needy and insecure. These are the childhood wounds that we bring into our partnerships. Even if we had a relatively healthy childhood, which very few of us have had, marriage will test you every step of the way.

A long-term partnership teaches you about heart and what it is to love. However,  our clumsy attempts at unconditional love repeatedly show us our bias’s and our fear of intimacy. It’s easy to say I accept you and love you but my subconscious mind, with all of it’s baggage and wounds and insecurities, keeps me projecting my preferences onto my beloved. I’m ok when you show up as x but not when you show up as y.

Marriage and life-long partnerships are a true Hero‘s Journey. Together you will face dragons that seem terrifying. Childhood monsters, traumas, fears of all sorts. You may face infidelity and fear of abandonment.  You will face a dark night of the soul, where it looks like it is falling apart and all hope is lost. When you are there, remember that it is just a chapter in your Hero’s Tale. Look for your resources and your mentor and forge on. You can do it.

And, like in a Hero’s tale, you will change and grow. Who you are in the next chapter will be a different version of yourself. It will be the same for your partner. I honor all of you on this path. For I know how challenging and frustrating it can be. Learning how to deal with yourself and this force of nature called your life partner.

With that being said, my blessing to you is you that you deeply honor your partner for what he or she is to you: a Soul mate who is deeply committed to your growth and someone who is helping you strengthen your heart. Interestingly, strong and loving hearts is exactly what the world is calling for right now.

Lisa Rezac Bio-

My guest today is an exceptional woman known for her beauty, intuition, humor, and courage. Lisa Rezac has been an classically trained actor, corporate trainer, entrepreneur, mother, and a fundraising auctioneer. She is a creative thinker and a person who models living your deepest truths. She has also been my life-partner for the past 26 years.

E62 Final Thoughts-

I hope you enjoyed hearing what conversations are like in the Rezac household. If you are a person who is committed to growing inside your relationship, I’ll recap some of the recommendations for you.

The Gottman Institute does some really amazing couples workshops and they have a list of Gottman trained therapists if you are looking for guidance. If your relationship is feeling stuck in some old patterns, finding a good therapist is essential to getting forward movement. It always worked for us. They are at www.gottman.com

What would Lisa and I have done had we not learned how to mirror? An essential tool for couples. You can learn it with the book called Getting the Love You Want by Harville Hendrix and find therapists that will teach you this and help you get better at it at www.harvilleandhelen.com

And lastly, there is a great book about life partners that sits on the top shelf of my library called Passionate Marriage by David Schnarch. He shows the reader the importance of differentiation and the power of learning how to validate yourself instead of always looking to your partner or other people. Very insightful book.

Thank you listeners (and readers)!

 

 

 

 

Basecamp for Men E61: The Male Archetypes

E61 Firestarters for Men: The Male Archetypes

 

I have talked about and teach within a framework of a collective masculinity expressed through five primary archetypes. These are Lover, Warrior, Magician,  and King. The four horsemen of the mature masculine. As well as a fifth,  the archetypal Hero.

I like to think of it as a sort of archetypal compass.  The Hero will be in the middle and the four archetypes in four directions acting as allies to the Hero, which is you.

Since one of my functions within my mission is to bring men new perspectives and new resources, I thought you might find it useful to unpack some of these collectives. Additionally, I thought if I could share with you some of the ways that men access and express these energies in the world, it would give you not only an overview but some tools that will help you where “the rubber meets the road”, so to speak.

Whenever I lead men’s groups, I always bring attention to these archetypes as a way to activate potential. Men are better able to activate the Hero within if they have a roadmap and allies. It is here in a more archetypal way of seeing or what Jung called the archetypal mind that men can find the start of new chapters for themselves.

I will go through each of these five archetypes  and give you a snapshot as well as access points to help you get in touch with these important parts of yourself.

I hope you enjoy E61: The Male Archetypes.

 

Basecamp for Men E60: Living a Mythic Life

E60: Living a Mythic Life with Special Guest Jon Wilson

 

E60 Introduction

As a collective, I see much in the male tribe to be optimistic about. Men from all walks of life seem to be ready for new tools and new narratives. Men are tired of the worn-out old stories about who we are and what we are capable (or incapable) of doing.

I feel a bit sheepish writing about myth . I don’t feel qualified. After all, Joseph Campbell laid it all out for us. However if I have learned anything from my studies it’s that myths are living stories. They demand our active participation to keep the transformative power in them. They are our partners through the ages and epochs, carrying wisdom and warnings and giving us a roadmap of the (sometimes) treacherous road that we face.

Once we learn to read the signposts of myth, we can step out onto the faint trail with much more confidence, having a bit more of an inkling of what might await us.

Myth also connects us to our ancestors near and far.  This is important in a number of ways. For one, that perspective can inspire us. If my late grandparents and great-grandparents and my son’s not-yet-born kids and grandkids are included in our mythic viewpoint, it starts to get interesting and personal in very immediate way. You’re not just playing for you. You’re playing for everyone in your circle. We’re all depending on you.

By consciously living a mythic life, you raise your hand to be counted. No matter where consciousness is taking us; no matter what our great human story has in store for us; by setting your life in mythic terms you state to unseen forces, higher beings and allies that are always helping us that YOU CAN COUNT ON ME. I am paying attention.

    In our modern lifestyle, men can feel that life is reduced to making as good a living as you can and be as good of a husband/partner/father you can be. It can feel a bit small for a man’s spirit. I know it can for me. Myth helps with this by enlarging the story into more proper proportions. This approach always works, by the way. 100% of the time.

If we are, as philosopher Charles Eisenstein says, “in-between stories”, then what tools are at our disposal to fully arrive at the new story? In this changing narrative, we will need a powerful, sturdy framework to keep us grounded.

It is here that myth is so valuable. In our search for our most courageous life, myths contain the instructions. They are built right into the story. The sub-conscious mind will pick up on all the details and nuances. You don’t necessarily have to be aware of all that (at least not at the beginning).

In high-level modern myth-telling like Lord of the Rings, or Star Wars, or The Matrix, you start with an awareness of a battle between Light and Darkness. This is a meta-myth. But as you watch or read the story, all the fascinating teachings start to unfold in your awareness: the arrival of the mentor, the dark night of the soul, the ascent, etc. AND as you steep yourself in this more mythical way of seeing the world, the EXACT SAME THING starts to happen to you. YOU see your test and your fear and reluctance. YOU leave the well-troden path to go find the faint trail. YOU experience the dark night of the soul and the arrival of a mentor. The Hero‘s Tale brings you into the action to share with you the transformative power of the myth.

Men need inspiration and clarity, not to mention magic and mystery, to lift them.  It is here on the mythic byways that men can find inner sustenance and food for the Soul.