Basecamp for Men E54: Educating Our Boys

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E54: Educating Our Boys with Special Guest Jennifer Fink   E54 Introduction Currently there is a sea change happening in how we educate our boys. Brought on by this pandemic, parents are looking at alternatives…

Basecamp for Men E36: The Genius of Children

E36: The Genius of Children with  Special Guest

Rick Ackerly

 

 

E36 Introduction

One of the sub-topics on Basecamp is the raising of boys, who will one day be our men. Our public school system is problematic in the development of our boys. This is not a knock on all the good people who teach and administer in the public schools. It’s just that having boys sit at a desk and do assigned, menial work without much collaboration or creative problem solving is essentially preparing them to sit and obey an authority figure. It’s social engineering. It‘s good preparation for the military or a life of following orders but is it maximizing their potential?

I have often thought that if you run the schools like a business with our young people like the customer, you would have VERY different schools.  I remember asking my young son Lucas, who was probably 8 or 9 at the time: “So if you are the customer, what does a school need to change to work well for you?” You know what he said? “Better food! The food is awful. Why don‘t they feed us healthier, better-tasting food.” What else, I asked him? More free time, more time to collaborate on projects with your friends. And more time outside and on field trips to learn. It sounds like a pretty great school to me. What kid would not want to go to THAT school? Sure, you still need some math and learn how to read but the boys would be so much more engaged in school, wouldn’t they?

I’m not saying that I have all the answers to how to best educate our kids. It’s just so obvious to the customers, the young people, that their time is precious too and why do they have to have such a boring, regimented curriculum? Even the teachers look burned-out and frayed by the system.

My guest today states that the education system today is primarily used as a social sorting device instead of vibrantly educating our children. That is an interesting notion.

And lastly, I think we consistently underestimate our young people. It‘s an old habit that we adults have that says that kids don’t really understand the world and so they need to sit on the sideline while we VIP adults handle the important projects of the world. I think this is a mistake.

Kids come with innate creativity and a sense of possibility that is often missing in adults. It’s been educated out of us.  Sure, some of their ideas are wild and far-fetched but in their free-flowing creativity, they will sometimes hit on ideas that adults just can’t conceive. What if we had kids of all ages working on the important problems of the world? I’m being serious. What solutions would they come up with? I for one, am curious.

 

Basecamp for Men E25: Championing Our Youth

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How do we help our youth thrive in today’s world? I won’t pretend that I know or have the answers. But I‘m more than willing to sit with the question.  And I love to get the perspectives of others as we seek resources and new approaches to growing our young people up. It does truly take a village and, thankfully, our village has collective wisdom.

Basecamp for Men E11: Building Boys

E11: Building Boys: A Conversation with Nicky Wilks

 

E11 Introduction

The topic of  boys and how to best set them up for optimal emotional well-being is a topic that is near and dear to me. With a twelve year-old son of my own and what I see as a woefully inept narrative when it comes to the inner lives of our boys, I have more than a passing concern with how we get our sons to healthy adulthood. What can a parent do to make sure our boys have what they REALLY need?

My guest today is an exceptional young man. Nicky Wilks has built his life’s purpose around providing training and resources for boys through his organization: Journeymen.

These trainings are powerful, inclusive, and help teen boys bridge the gap from confused, isolated, and hormonal young people to emerging young men with purpose, a budding emotional intelligence, and a community that supports and understands them. This is a noble mission and my conversation with Nicky is insightful and timely.

As a parent of a young boy, I am grateful to Nicky and the team at Journeymen for providing safe spaces for our boys to take their Hero’s Journey.

These types of trainings set a firm foundation for these boys to start their journey into adulthood. In today’s world,  a true rite-of-passage for boys is a rare thing. Join Nicky and I as we look at Journeymen’s high-quality outdoor adventures, what parents need to know about them, and what the boys get out of their participation.

Thank you listeners!

Tony

Basecamp for Men E9: Fatherhood Wide Open

E9: Fatherhood Wide Open with Special Guest Kyle Bradford

 

E9 Introduction

The heartbeat of this episode is AUTHENTICITY and my guest Kyle Bradford certainly embodies this quality. He shoots straight, tells it like it is, and owns his own mistakes and shadow. In short, he exemplifies living “wide open” and Kyle parents in this same style, as you’ll find out in this episode. We talk about gender, traditional values, and difficult discussions with our children.

Authenticity requires the courage to speak your truth. Fake is out. So is political correctness. Being real is what has others love and respect you. Join us in this discussion about living the genuine life and parenting our sons in the digital age.

Kyle Bradford Bio

Kyle Bradford is the writer behind  CHOPPERPAPA.COM, a blog dedicated to observations and discussions about marriage, single parenting, dating, divorce, and manhood.

Here is my interview with Kyle Bradford.

E9 Final Thoughts

I hope you enjoyed our time with Kyle Bradford. I think he exemplifies having courage in facing yourself and being authentic with your children. Parents often try and hide their wounds from their children and loved ones but I think this is a mistake. When you are authentic and come from the heart, people (including children) will give you space to show up in your humanity. I don‘t know any perfect people. But I do know lots of real people who make mistakes, look honestly at themselves, learn valuable lessons, and then communicate those lessons with heart and humility.

One thing I wanted to mention is the book The Porn Trap by Wendy and Larry Maltz. This is an essential book for anyone that is curious about the impact of pornography on your brain and your life. And for parents of young boys, it‘s an ally in understanding this lurking element that all of our boys will have to deal with. I hope to get Wendy and Larry on soon for more insights on this important topic.

I hope you enjoyed the episode. Thank you for listening to Basecamp for Men. And we’ll see you next week.